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What do you have to do to ACTUALLY practice self-compassion?

In Volair's Devotion program, one of the discussions in our live, online gathering started withthe question:

"I know I NEED to be more compassionate with myself, but HOW? What are some actionable steps?"

This is an incredible question and started a RICH discussion! Knowing that you need to be more self-compassionate is an amazing step! Wanting to become more self-compassionate is an amazing step! And it often ends there because we don't know the HOW. In this video, I talk about the HOW. And I will briefly summarize below.


In our group gathering, we discussed the need to consciously become aware of our subconscious thoughts and judgements and to evaluate whether those beliefs are true to us and serving us NOW. Or if we need to step in with our conscious thought to create new beliefs to override our ones that are no longer serving us. For example, if you have a pattern of self-deprication or negative self-talk when you haven't been "productive enough" or "successful enough" or "fast enough" or whatever... When you notice yourself having these thoughts of not enoughness (which are coming from your subconscious), then you have the opportunity to step in and consciously evaluate:


Am I really a bad person because I didn't get through the task list with 120 hrs of work in my 8hr work day? The answer is probably No. Then, can I choose to show myself compassion by celebrating what I did get done and evaluating whether I really needed the slow day today? Related to this conversation, we also talked about the arbitrary moral judgements we give different ways of being that, if we really stop to think about it, we may see that they don't really make sense. The idea that GOOD people have an impeccably clean home and BAD people are messy. Really? The idea that GOOD people are busy and hardworking and BAD people who are not super productive are lazy. Really? The idea that GOOD people workout regularly and BAD people don't. Really? If you are working towards showing yourself more compassion, I invite you to take some time to really examine your thoughts and moral judgements. Do you really believe them? Are they serving you? Do you want to change them? And if you do want to start changing them, why not start now! You don't have to do it all at once, but starting with one thought would be really kind and compassionate to you.


The Volair Life is all about supporting fitness professionals and enthusiasts to live more consciously. Fitness has become an entanglement of not-so-helpful beliefs and judgements that keep us stuck in patterns of negative self-judgement, dissatisfaction, and conditional acceptance. By consciously unravelling the f*cked-up-ed-ness of the fitness industry and its toxic culture and messaging, we can start to liberate ourselves and create spaces of self-love and liberation for our clients. To join the discussion, sign up for our weekly newsletter here.

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